Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Black Kate Moss


Many of you have been throwing prayers up my way, asking for a black Kate Moss. For a guy who knows absolutely everything, like that time you did that thing to that guys car, asking for a black version of a model was still a little confusing. Then I heard the new Kanye West album, and now I get it.

I also get that many of you who have been praying for this for awhile now probably downloaded this album illegally. I take all that into account for if you get in here or not, so be careful. The IRAA is the least of your worries.

That being said, I LOVE the new Iron & Wine album.

Anyway, in regards to a black Kate Moss...

This is not perfection, people. I make each one of you perfectly. I spend months putting you together. Few things scare Me, but you my friend, I was freaked out when I was putting you together. You were fearfully and wonderfully made, and so was white Kate Moss. I'm sorry if you think I screwed up and that Kate Moss should have been a black person, but I made her a white girl for a reason. Kate Moss is a white girl and she's staying that way.

Now, a black Twiggie, that would be interesting. Although the line "you could be my black Twiggie tonight" might be a little confusing. What about "you could be my white Naomi Campbell tonight"? You could really get wild if you added some crayon colors into it, such as "you could be my neon carrot Gisele Bundchen tonight" or "you could be my eggplant Adriana Lima tonight".

But for the record, no black Kate Moss.

For those of you wondering what a white Kanye West might sound like, pick up his new album, it's pretty impressive.

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Jesus, I would absolutely love a black Jennifer Lopez. And I refuse to accept the current Jennifer Lopez, just wearing a headband and dating P. Diddy, because that didn't convince me and it didn't work.

 
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